Today, I decided that I have been undergoing a full moon release for the past couple of days. It actually started about two weeks ago with a dream… A dream of a volcano about to explode, breathing out smoke and ash as it has for a while. None of the villagers knew when it would explode, but eventually it would, and so they were moving out of the way. I was on my way to be the bride in a wedding.
Well, I thought about it a little bit, asked a couple people about what it could mean, and we came up that it could mean a huge emotional outburst with my boyfriend. I couldn’t see it happening any time soon since things between us were going well.
Then I have another volcano dream, one I can’t remember details of, while at my boyfriends house. Immediately I get up and look it up in the dream dictionary, and it states “emotional outburst of pent up emotion.” Interesting.
Then that night overwhelming anger comes up. I rant. I cry. My heart feels so full of pain. I don’t understand the worlds cruelties. I know that this world is not supposed to be like this. It is supposed to be a place of love and joy for everyone. My boyfriend listens and hugs me.
The next day I feel a bit off, a bit blue, but what are you going to do? Sometimes I have blue days. Later that night I feel it deep in my soul and I pray, crying for help from the Universe and the Ones who work with me. And I fear I don’t have the strength to do the next major piece of my journey.
All I hear is “You do. You have the Strength.” And I know they will help me. I can do it.
I cried for a few hours that night, and it seemed to release a lot of things emotionally. I could feel things shifting around inside my body and my mind. I also have a new focus in my life: Self-sustainability.
I am very happy and excited for this part of my journey. I know I will make it.
So tonight, for my full moon ceremony I wrote a short list of what I want to release and burned it. I then spent time expressing gratitude for everything – those that work with me, the people that surround me, that where I am now is such a better place on all levels than where I was last year at this time, and more.
Now I am happily off to accomplish my mission for 2012: Self-sustainability!
Jade is one of two stones that help increase one’s ability to be self-sustainable. 🙂